Ok, so I've been going to the gym in the mornings. I actually really like it, and as a non-morning person, I never thought I would. But...
I don't like when naked ladies walk around the changeroom. I'm not comfortable with nudity, any kind of nudity, but especially the ugly kind. I've tried to adapt: I shower (in my bathing suit - hey, I'm not a hypocrite) as quickly as possible and with my eyes averted. But I keep running into things and I'm still having awkward encounters so I've made a list of rules, nudity rules if you will...
1. You're walking around naked but carrying your towel. USE THAT TOWEL DAMMIT!! It's right there, slung across your arm put that puppy to use and cover your shame!! No naked walking: all towels all the time.
2. Don't talk to me if you're naked, especially if you don't know me, or even if you DO know me, wait, ESPECIALLY if you know me. Let's just keep it simple: No Naked Talking ever, it should be dead silent in the change room. It may not be friendly, but I don't want to be naked friendly.
3. When changing, keep your items close at hand, no reaching for things. When you reach things move and dangle, and it's gross and awkward. And dear God, no bending, EVER. No naked bending or reaching.
4. Half-naked is still naked. I don't want to see you blow-drying your hair with a shirt on but no pants or underwear. Seriously, who gets ready this way, IN PUBLIC! Jesus! Or standing at the mirror applying eye make up with tights, skirt, heels but no shirt. Wha? Half naked is still whole wrong.
Naked changerooms are for porn movies and teenaged boys' fantasies. It's time for a change, literally, for god sake, CHANGE INTO SOME CLOTHES, as quickly as possible please.
2 comments:
I COMPLETELY agree with EVERYTHING that you said!! Someone, please hand them a towel.
And no sitting on a bench naked. You wouldn't sit on someone's couch naked, why sit on a public bench?
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