Things my Father Taught Me

I was reading this list of things the writer learned from his father. So I'm starting my own. Just so you know, my dad is awesome, he is the most supportive person I know and while he may not be overly emotional or sentimental he never hesitates to tell his kids he loves them and that he's proud of them. That's pretty amazing. So here's a few of the myriad of things I've learned from my dad:

- Hard work is rewarded and persistence is a virtue.
- Stay in school or you will end up a garbage collector or a cashier at Zellers.
- Be friendly to everyone and you'll have lots of friends
- A decent swear word is not something to throw around willy-nilly. Use swears in moderation. But when you do use one, make it a gooder.
- Women who swear have the vocabulary of "street-walkers". Yea, I realize the irony, his daughter does have the mouth of a sailor. (He's secretly proud)
- How to make a wine glass sing.
- What exactly "icing" is in hockey.
- How to drive, use a tire gauge, change a tire and refill the washer fluid.
- The world is an amazing place and you can learn all about it by watching the Discovery Channel but it's better to get your ass off the couch and go visit it.
- How to swim but also to have a healthy fear and respect for water.
- Family is paramount and a good son or daughter looks after their parents once they're not able to look after themselves.
- When you're playing sports, get a little rough, set a tone and your opponent will back off for the rest of the game.
- How to read a map and when, in the name of an adventure, you shouldn't use a map at all.
- Not to feel guilty if you fall asleep at the movies. It's your $10, you can spend it on a good nap if you want.
- Knowing anything about celebrity culture is a waste of time. (While I technically agree, I just can't help myself)
- Get your ass back and play defense, no one can respect a cherry picker.
- WRITING IN CAPS SAVES TIME AND DOES NOT NECESSARILY MEAN I AM YELLING (although sometimes I am)
- Don't spend your money on that crap, put it in the bank.
- A man who truly loves his wife and daughters will go get tampons at Safeway when there's a period emergency
- Turn the electricity off before you start poking around with a screw driver.
- Look out the window when you're on a road trip, this may be the only time in your life you get to see this.
- Treat everyone with respect, even if they haven't earned it, that way you can always respect yourself.